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On Change and Changing

Nature is our master teacher, teaching us how to live, what to eat, when to rest and when to dance.
Sometimes it happens with the subtle shift in the breeze, the first sprouts poking through the earth and sometimes it is with the full force of it’s power.
Change is going to happen and keep happening again and again not only whether we want it or not but in spite of us.
Learning to like it…accept it…embrace it and rise to it’s challenge is our work.
The changes in nature happen without effort or worry on our part. We certainly experience the changes but the process of change has little to do with us.
Pay attention, it teaches us to trust. Eventually.
Things will not stay the same, trust that, they are going to be different today or tomorrow or next year.
I’m watching and learning every day to relax into change and get better at it. Fluid, graceful, powerful in it’s unfolding…personally, I’m not there yet. I know change will come, nature is showing me this, the world is showing me this but often at the beginning, when change is introduced, I react and think that I can’t possibly do it. I can’t possibly do things differently again…I LIKE the way they are now…even if I said I didn’t yesterday.

It’s October and I listen to people coming to work expressing how they’re struggling with the cold mornings and dark. It’s hard to wake up and be productive. My question is, why struggle? Why not sleep longer, letting our bodies adjust without force?
We don’t want summer to end but it’s over and we’re moving on. It will drag us or we can learn to honor the change.

Honoring change is possibly the most reverent way to acknowledge and begin. I will sit quietly, light a candle and let the feeling of the change fill me up. I do this with the seasons, in real life, in work life. Find a way to acknowledge and honor the past well so that I am free to move forward. I am clumsy and emotional as I look for ways to stop fighting it and begin to honor it. I look for ways to grow with it.
Growing with it and suddenly I’m all in. I know that whatever change brings, I will get better and I get better at life. It keeps me from getting complacent or bored. It challenges me to learn, to move in a new way. I’ve learned to love the process. It’s fascinates me.

I have a chef at the restaurant. He’s talented and worked to become a partner. For the first time in 20 years, he runs the kitchen, manages the staff. Life is good and I am free to have one. I fell in love and everything is puppies and rainbows.
Well, he doesn’t want to be a partner anymore, in fact, he gave his notice along with the manager so that they could open their own place together. So much for those puppies and rainbows.
First, I went outside, hyperventilated and cried and raged. Second, I spent a couple of weeks working with a coach, trying to figure out what else I would do after I sold my business, sold my house and moved away someplace I did not know of yet. Third, I really thought about my life. I looked through my journals and thought about my personal desires and dreams. Then I thought about how to align myself with those desires even as the world as I know it is shifting.
The world will continue to shift. It is in our response…can we open our hearts to something new, letting go of the old and keep our desires in focus so that we move through change and not lose ourselves.
Can I let go of the branch on the bank of a river, pick my feet up and float. Can I stop fighting the current?

There is real, paralyzing fear around change. The fear is incredibly powerful but I know that fear will eventually drown us.
I have a desire…which means I don’t actually HAVE that desire in this moment, so there must be a moment of change, of some kind of change, that will propel me from point A to point B. That moment is usually a big fat surprise.

I breathe. I meditate. I practice yoga. I walk in nature.
I am strong and I will move with strength, excitement and hopefully grace,
through change.

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September is a month of adjustment. We know change is coming as the days get shorter. The market is exploding with color, sweetness, variety! Everything we grow is available now. It is the apex of the year! We are canning and freezing and dehydrating the bounty, preparing.
We are preparing. There is whisper of change.
I have been thinking of updating my kitchen, roofing my house, siding and painting my house. I have a few weeks with my chef before someone new begins to train. Adam has been thinking of moving some things in from his storage unit. Talking, thinking, planning.
We are preparing. There is whisper of change.

October has arrived and fall is upon us. The leaves are turning, the nights are chilly and the first frost abruptly stops summer. I am in the middle of all of it, as it swirls and blows around me. Yes! Yes! Yes! Let’s do this! A new chef begins, there are workman crawling all over my house, putting on a roof, new siding, painting and remodeling the kitchen. Adam has moved his tools in and calls it home.
I am in the middle of it.
It is exciting, challenging, uncomfortable, unnerving and wonderful!
It demands that I participate in it’s unfolding.

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